I've been known to write descriptive sex in my stories. I’m certainly not opposed to graphic love scenes in SFR {science fiction romance} And I have a SFR series coming soon on the horizon that contains tech as well as hot sex. But that's not to say all books should contain this type of scene, and that includes the Soul-Love Series.

We all know books with lots of sex are everywhere these days. Not just graphic language but heavy sex scenes are easy to find. Authors are told highly erotic books sell better. Hmm maybe.

There are stories that do not lend well to heavy graphic sex scenes. For example, in the Remember Him Yesterday books, it isn't likely because it doesn't fit with the characters nor the essence of these stories. 

On the other hand, descriptive sex does work for other authors, other books. Some of my best friends write mainly erotic romance, being good at both crafting a story and writing sexually graphic scenes.

Lately I've been thinking about why we, as a society, want our entertainment to be so heavily sexually laden. Movies, books, everywhere. Are our lives so boring or void of good times that we seek out this sort of entertainment? Do we need the kink to add excitement to our lives, or maybe it’s just that we like the darker side of… hmm?

According to spiritual/sex/relationship guru, David Deida there is a darker side to our sexual desires. And he's not labeling dark as bad. He does say, however, we should work on our “enlightened selves” if we want to grow and have a stellar life as well as intimate sex with our partner.

Can I write the Soul-Love Series as sensual without having heavy graphic sex and still capture readers’ attention? What if I want to convey something else? Like spiritual love or soul level intimacy? I say yes and sure. Nicholas Sparks does it every day. 

That's not to say Nick and Krista don't have a rollicking good love/sex life. They do. And it is there.

Yet their love scenes land somewhere between highly sensuous and esoteric. Aside from developing the characters and the other elements of this story, deeper levels of emotion and love is what makes Remember Him Yesterday and the other Nick and Krista stories really kick, not over the top sex.

If your characters and/or story doesn't warrant heavy graphic sex, don't throw it in the book just because. Know when to hold or hit. And stay true to your idea. 

See you inside my books.


© copyright Kaye Manro 2016

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